Penumbra's Head Office is moving. Our address from 16 December 2024 will be: Penumbra, 3rd Floor, Orchard Brae House, 30 Queensferry Road, Edinburgh, EH4 2HS. Our telephone number 0131 475 2380 will be moving with us and we may experience some downtime during the move. If you have problems contacting us, please use our temporary number 0131 380 2669.

The Warrior and The Beast

Anxiety is a sneaky beast.

An unwanted bastard.

One moment you’re fine.

The other, you’re down the dumps.

It hits you out of nowhere.

You’re unprepared.

Not armed properly.

And certainly not ready to fight.

Anxiety likes to attack from behind.

First, you feel it simmering inside you. Unconsciously, you clench your teeth. Your muscles begin to tense up.

Then, the simmer turns into a bubble.

Like a volcano close to eruption.

Your heartbeat increases. You feel hot and sick.

The tense feeling gets worse.

It intensifies in milliseconds.

And spreads like a nasty germ. It becomes unstoppable.

Creeping in every corner of your body.

Becoming all-consuming.

That’s when it hits you full-on. You’re going to boil over.

You panic.

And try to take it off the heat.

But it’s too late.

Survival mode is switched on.

Your brain freezes.

Unable to think clearly.

You feel paralysed. Shell-shocked.

You’re gonna be ok.

That’s what you tell yourself.

It’s just a feeling.

Nothing is going to happen.

Take a deep breath.

Inhale, exhale. And repeat.

Inhale, exhale.

You have to stay focused.

Leave no room for your thoughts.

That’s your weapon. Your superpower.

The beast slowly loses shape.

It fades away.

With every breath you take. Until it dissolves in thin air.

Eventually, the anxiety is gone.

You won.

But it will come back.

You stay alert, frightened.

But remember.

Every victory counts.

It weakens the anxiety.

And one day, it’s goodbye forever.

Thank you Cate for sharing your poem. 

Visit the Your Journeys page and read more inspiring stories, penumbra.org.uk/your-journeys

If you are completing a self-referral, complete all of section A and then click next to submit the form. 

If you are referring someone for support, please complete sections A and B.

Welcome to our online self-referral form. Please complete as much of this form as possible. Once we receive your form, we aim to respond within 72 hours. Thank you.

Please complete Section A (details of the person you are referring) and Section B (your own details as the referrer)

Once we have your form, our team will aim to contact the person you’re referring within 72 hours. Thank you.

How can we help you?

Thank you for considering leaving a gift in your Will.

To receive further information about the process and to find out how your gift could be used, please complete and return the form below. Thank you.

Please give us as much information as you can. Once we have your form, our team will aim to contact you within 72 hours. Thank you.

Privacy and data policy. This site can collect anonymous and identifiable personal data. Read our privacy and data policy on how to browse the site anonymously, otherwise click the button to accept anonymous data collection. We will ask your consent when we need to collect identifiable data. Our Privacy Policy and Cookies Policy

Courage

We will do the right thing. Standing up for people, their rights, wellbeing and recovery

Compassion

We listen and respond with hope, kindness and respect.

Curiosity

We explore, reflect, learn and adapt to create solutions that are best for people’s wellbeing.

Collaboration

We will work with those who share our vision and values.